Sitting on my hands at Bergdorf's.

Today I was content in an upscale, quiet camera shop editing and ordering photos on their computer. A woman entered the shop. She was my age, or older. I am 47 years old. She had three children with her, all under the age of 5. The oldest child whizzed through the door screaming and wheeling a toddler in a stroller. The third child, about 31/2, came into the store twirling and running after the other two children.
The woman, completely unfazed, sat down next to me and began ordering her photos on the computer as well. She also calmly began expressing to the three children how she wanted them to behave.
At this point, the twirling child was falling down dizzy, laying on the floor and screaming. The oldest child was screaming with his voice and screaming that stroller around the displays. All of a sudden, these three children were disrupting everyone and in a way, had taken control of the aura of the entire store. I had the distinct impression that this Mother lives her life in this manner, and behaves like this everywhere she goes, and allows her children to do the same.
What has happened to our polite, puritanical behavior here in America? Have we gone stark, screaming mad? I knew this woman was as old as I, therefore must remember being raised in the 60's. Back in the day when we were raised on a respectful fear of our parents and elders.
Then, I remembered sitting on my hands in the Delmann Shoe Department at the Bergdorf Goodman Department Store in New York City as a child. Yes, quietly sitting, lightly on my hands, patiently watching my Mother try on hard to find size 11 shoes. No hardship lesson here. Bergdorf's is a beautiful store. I had fun looking at all the lovely shoes. I imagined myself one day doing the same. Teaching tolerance and patience. Using one's own imagination during a quiet moment. Nothing wrong with teaching children these lessons.

Friends and Family are Forever

As the self-appointed family historian, in 2005, I published a Forget-Me-Not book complete with poems, lyrics, rhymes and cleaver quips combined with corresponding family photographs from the turn of the last century. The collection celebrates friends and family.
I have sold only 150 copies and have sent 50 copies to local and national media including Oprah, Ellen, FOX, Vogue Magazine, People Magazine and the New York Times. No one was interested.
The pretty trade paper "coffee table" book was not an international best seller. Early last year in 2008, I decided to begin donating the book to local retirement and nursing homes. They were absolutely appreciative and thankful for this thoughtful, soulful, inspirational book. I am so fortunate to be able to give to others.
During this "Retirement Recession" of sorts at best, are Americans less fortunate now than we were in 2005? Do we need the fancy new cars, designer dry goods and huge houses to feel like we have a better life and are closer to our happier family and friends? I say who needs designer goods when you simply appreciate and remember your friends and family, the best kind of vintage.

You are who your friends are on Facebook

Last month we dumped our old dial up and finally got high speed. Last week I found Facebook. This week friends and family found me on Facebook. Wow. Current friends. College friends. High School friends. Childhood friends. My childhood nemesis. Old boyfriends. Oh my! Your good past and bad past does come back to haunt and taunt you. Yikes!
I set up a profile. Name, address, phones, marital status. Current job. Old jobs. Education. Favorite movies. Favorite books.  Favorite photos. Family photos. Profile photos. Favorite places traveled. All places traveled. Facebook even has a section for political views and religious views. Remember however what your mother told you about religion and politics. Hard not to offend someone else eventually.
And just like that, my Facebook profile page now reflects who I am and who my friends and family are. Just think, a few posted pages reflect your entire being. A resume of your life. Fascinating and frightening. A record of everything you type onto some elses Facebook Wall. Permanent public babble posted in writing forever. So, always keep it positive. Colleges and future employers will be checking out your FB page, and Googling your name.
Facebook is also addictive. Time can be wasted. So, keep it quick, informative and interesting. Stay away from what you ate for dinner. Not all thoughts are diamonds.  
The old expression "Birds of a feather flock together," really has come home to roost on Facebook. Just keep it pithy and positive!

Letters to the Editors

Last month,
I had my second LTTE make in into the February 2009 issue of VOGUE Magazine. It was a nothing comment about the November, 2008 issue of VOGUE prematurely predicting the outcome of the November Presidential election. The November issue hit the new stands on October 18th.
Last week, I received a nice letter from the Editor of Town & Country Magazine, saying I had sent in an "amazing" story. Don't know if they will publish it or not.
I have also written a LTTE to Marie Claire Magazine. Have not heard anything yet, but it has only been 2 weeks.
The point is, keep on trying and never give up. Never, never, never. It's not easy, but eventually any task will be worth a steady effort.

A poem from my book Forget-Me-Not, Forget-Me-Never:

Never be flat,
Never be sharp,
And always be natural.

Elsie Verick
December 29, 1905

Enjoy the hope full Sunday snow!

6th Anniversary Poem

From the book: Forget-Me-Not, Forget-Me-Never,
Remember the Fun We Had Together

Doubt the sun is afire,
Doubt that the moon is above,
Doubt that the truth is a liar,
But never doubt my love.

Maude Hays
January 20, 1906

Happy Anniversary to my husband Jimbo.
Love you, Kathy-lu

Bullies and Original Sin

Thinking recently on vacation about "Bullies." These people always seem out of control with their own lives which is why they want to control everyone Else's lives. It's a control thing. One lesson I have learned this year is: One can only control one's own behavior, not someone Else's behavior. If one never says anything negative, no one can truthfully repeat anything negative said. Just breath deeply, rise above the fray and keep on going in a positive direction. Work on this task every day. It's not easy, but it's healthy and right.

From Forget-Me-Not, Forget-Me-Never book:

You ask for something original,
I scarcely know how to begin,
For there is nothing original in me,
Unless 'tis original sin.

Miss Elizabeth "Elsie" Schaefer
June 24, 1906

Valentine's Day "After School Special" story

Being in First Grade, I thought Valentine's Day at a girl's school was kind of silly but figured we would pass out friendship cards and maybe get some candy.
First thing in the morning, Mrs. Kirk, our kind teacher, passed out plain brown paper bags. We were instructed to put our first names on the front and decorate the bags appropriately for the holiday. Then, alphabetically, we filed up to the wall and taped them underneath the chalkboard. open the bags up, and throughout the day, place the Valentine cards we had previously made for our friends.
All day long, when leaving the room for morning milk and cookie break, lunch, recess, and P.E. class at the Gym, in alphabetical order, we passed by , in alphabetical order of course, all those Valentine's Day bags. Some girls would lean over and try to peak into their bag, but would slow up the line and have to resort to keep on going. The pink and red anticipation grew. How many Valentine cards would we each get from our class of 20 girls? Would we be happy with only a few. Who would get the most valentine cards? Who would get the least. Who really cared so long as we were happy.
At three o'clock, our school day was finally over and as we leave for the day, we were instructed to pluck our full bags from the wall underneath the chalkboard. As a "B", my bag was on the top row. As I plucked it off of the wall, my hand hit the metal chalk tray and some chalk dust fell through the air and onto the floor like cement dust. I automatically stopped yelped "Ouch"and grabbed my hand, so the teacher said I could go to my desk for a minute and rest.
As I sat at my desk in the now quiet room, and glanced up to see that Mrs. Kirk's slip was showing and her butt was wiggling as she was reaching up to heartily erase and clean the black chalkboard. My left hand suddenly stopped smarting, as my right hand had pulled out the 4 Valentine cards I had received. They said the following: "You are stupid", "You are dumb", "You are nice", "You are ugly".
I remember telling Mrs. Kirk my hand was fine and saying goodbye. I remember silently and numbly walking the 6 blocks home as if on automatic pilot. I remember my Mother's words: "How could a bunch of First Graders be so mean." I do not remember crying and crying, but I do remember I did not want to go to school the next day. I returned to school the next day anyway.

A better Valentines Day to all y'all readers !!